


The Fastest Way to a Man’s Heart is through his Leg

by girl_interrupted_420_69



Category: Ratatouille (2007), SpongeBob SquarePants (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-12 07:35:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29006895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/girl_interrupted_420_69/pseuds/girl_interrupted_420_69
Summary: "a masterwork of literature"  - my mom
Relationships: Remy & The guy who shouts "my leg!!" in Spongebob
Comments: 6
Kudos: 10





	The Fastest Way to a Man’s Heart is through his Leg

The restaurant business was a rough one. Once work had gotten out that the Parisian 4-star restaurant Ratatouille employed a head chef of and served many a clientele of the rat species, it had only been a matter of days before it had been closed down for good, leaving Remy to aimlessly wander the streets of Paris and develop an unhealthy affinity for alcohol.

“This is discrimination,” Remy slurred in a drunken haze as he stumbled into a dirty alleyway. Suddenly, Remy was jolted almost into sobriety when he heard a large crashing sound from deeper in the alleyway accompanied by a loud manly voice yelling “my leg!!” in pain. 

In hindsight, if he had not been completely wasted, Remy was sure that he would not have approached the distressed man at all. But alas, he had ingested about as much alcohol as his tiny rat liver could handle and before he knew it, he stumbled over to the agonizing man. 

“My leg!” The man cried out, meeting Remy’s beady little eyes with his own. Remy looked at the pain laced into the man’s expression and saw his own reflection; his hopes, his dreams, and his months (rats don’t live that fucking long) of culinary training blowing away like someone’s dead grandma’s ashes at Disney world. 

“My leg,” The man whimpered with relatively less ferocity. “My leg…. my leg…” His voice tapered out to a whisper.   
“Shhhhhh,” Remy squeaked soothingly. “Your leg…”  
“My… leg…”

**Author's Note:**

> 🎶🎵🎶  
> Remy, the ratatouille  
> The rat of all my dreams  
> I praise you, my ratatouille  
> May the world remember  
> Your name
> 
> Remy, the ratatouille  
> The rat of all my dreams  
> I praise you, my ratatouille  
> May the world remember  
> Your name
> 
> Remy, the ratatouille  
> The rat of all my dreams  
> I praise you, my ratatouille  
> May the world remember  
> Your name
> 
> Remy, the ratatouille  
> The rat of all my dreams  
> I praise you, my ratatouille  
> May the world remember  
> Your name
> 
> Remy, the ratatouille  
> The rat of all my dreams  
> I praise you, my ratatouille  
> May the world remember  
> Your name
> 
> Remy, the ratatouille  
> The rat of all my dreams  
> I praise you, my ratatouille  
> May the world remember  
> Your name  
> 🎶🎵🎶


End file.
